Inspiration

Today, I had an encounter with a wild animal. One of the fiercest of wild animals found in and around Logan, Utah. Let me tell you our story.

For some background, things are a little touch-and-go right now. You know, some ups, a few more downs. It's the end of the semester and my summer is looking a little bleak, thus, not a whole lot to look forward to. Now, I would only write that if it were pertinent to my story. Which it is. So let me continue on, please. Sheesh.

My dear friend Jason Crofts is on a mission. I write him quite regularly. A few months ago, he was transferred. I have sent him several pieces of mail with no reply. The other day I wrote him a letter requesting a response, so my roommate and I have both been checking the mail daily, hoping to find a little parcel of mail with his and my name on it. Just a few moments ago, I went in search of that blessedly hopeful parcel of mail. I set off to the lounge, strolling casually along the sidewalk so as to not let myself (and the others around) know I was desperate to get to the mailbox. Desperate to get that piece of mail. I reach the mailbox, insert the key, turn the latch. The door creaks open. Lo and behold... nothing. Another day of an empty mailbox. Despairingly, I hang my head, re-lock the latch, and slowly walk from the lounge.

I emerge from the lounge and follow the curve of the sidewalk back towards my building. I was deeply immersed in my thoughts of disappointment. I glance up from my gloomy trudge, and see something that surprises me enough to stop me in my tracks. There, not 7 and 1/2 feet away, was a beautiful brown duck. Shocked, I stared at the duck, and the duck stared back. What was a duck doing here? There is no water here, no other ducks, no significant source of food. So what was she doing? We continued to stare, sizing one another up. We stayed that way for a while. Staring, taking every detail in. She was a beautiful auburn color with white pin-stripes on her feathers. Under her camouflage colors I spotted a royal blue feather. Her eyes were beady and her beak was sleek and black. Everything about her was beautiful.

Eventually I lost her attention (we all know I'm not that interesting to look at) and she cautiously waddled towards me, one eye in my direction, the other searching for any scrap of food that might be around. She nibbled here and there, as I continued to stare. This young duck, with a cautious boldness, continued about her business in the presence of an animal 30 times her size, who could very easily have been dangerous or caused her harm. I was impressed, and continued to watch her until I found myself wondering what the all the people in the surrounding apartments were thinking, watching me stare at a duck on the lawn. I kept my distance as I walked away, and found myself glancing backwards as I left. My feelings of distress over the lack of letter were forgotten, as I continued to feel bewildered by the duck.

As I thought about it, it became clear to me. This duck meant something. Regardless of what most people would say, I needed to see that duck today, because that duck was the part of me that I struggle with. That duck represents the girl who isn't afraid to be beautiful in her own way. A girl who faces adversity cautiously, but with a certain boldness that cannot be diminished. A girl who isn't afraid to be herself. A girl who isn't afraid of the unknown, just aware.

So now, as I face a summer of uncertainty, challenges, and a lot of alone time, I will remember that duck, and hopefully that girl inside me will blossom into something as magnificent as that duck.